Many a true word spoken in jest.......................

I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you 
can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.

I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are 
just assholes.

I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and only
suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.

I've learned that you can get by on charm for about fifteen 
minutes. After that, you'd better have a big dick or huge tits.

I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - 
they are more fucked up than you think.

I've learned that you can keep puking long after you think 
you're finished.

I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless 
we are celebrities.

I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a 
relationship is at first, the passion fades, and there had 
better be a lot of money to take its place.

I've learned that sometimes the people you expect to kick you 
when you're down will be the ones who do.

I've learned that we don't have to ditch bad friends because 
their dysfunction makes us feel better about ourselves.

I've learned that no matter how you try to protect your 
children, they will eventually get arrested and end up in 
the local paper.

I've learned that the people you care most about in life are 
taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just 
never go away.

I've learned to say "Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke" in 6
languages.

Pass this along to 5 friends...trust me, they'll appreciate it.

Who knows, maybe something good will happen. If not ... 
tough shit.